I am officially allowed to sing and play the blues now.

For my friends, family, and readers who cannot and will not understand or try to understand why I have been doing some of the radical things I have been doing lately, such as being arrested deliberately, please know that for many years, once upon a time, I saw things from your side. Probably even held a a staunchly more conservative view than you can imagine. Until recently, I have always followed the letter of the law in my activism, such as signing petitions and merely marching in rallies. I have done things the way the law tells me I must, but nothing ever changed. It never gets any better. It only gets worse and the lies from above get bigger and more outlandish as more and more go without the hard-earned dollars they should be getting a lot more of than they do.

And now people who lie across railroad tracks may potentially be considered terrorists because they are trying to save the planet from the corporate "people" who are raping the planet of its valuable, non-renewable resources, creating pollution on a scale never seen before, manipulating the government and the economy...egads, where does it have to end before people will stop scratching their heads and wondering what I'm taking against a stand against...and why. And for whom. I love you ladles and jellyspoons, and wish I could tell you how it feels the moment you realize you are willing to put yourself at great risk for something to change for the good. I know exactly what I'm doing. And I'm doing it because I believe someone has to. May as well be me. Don't support my cause, that's fine. Don't support me if you don't choose to, and that's fine, too. But please don't tell me I'm an idiot for doing something that you've never done, especially considering the conscious reasons I'm making these decisions. If you don't understand it from my perspective, it does not make it stupid. It only makes it a wrong choice for you. A right choice for me. Not wrong for either...just different.

This isn't open for discussion; I simply wanted a place to air how I feel. Yes, I'm proud to have been arrested, and I think you would be, too, if you were in my shoes, but bigger than my pride is my sorrow for the lessons I learned in jail...that our country dropped the ball on seeing to the wellbeing of its citizens' children. As a former foster parent, I got to see where my foster kids end up: like the 21-year old mother of two who has been in this jail 11 times this year. Where did we go wrong, America? What do I do to fix it? I might not get it right, but at least I'm trying. Radical Altruism. Because Greed, Corruption, and War don't work. Peaceful action might. It's hella cheaper than funding a pre-spun war overseas, too. All we want are some warm blankets and a cuppa or a bowl of hot soup (I've been craving a hearty vegetarian leek and potato soup for weeks) while we hang out together and try to change things. As my original sign reads..."Please pardon our peaceful chaos as we reboot our country's operating system". There's bound to be some inconvenience, just like when there's a detour when the road is being fixed. It's a bother, but in the end, the smooth surface makes the traveling so much nicer.

I will be telling my jail story soon. I'm still decompressing and digesting. I'm glad I did it. It was enlightening. I've grown.

Wishing each of you and yours the very brightest blessings of the holiday season. Namaste'.